(semi serious???) looking for some advice

[_chain 175]

hi guys. uhh, yeah. i kinda need some real girl advice. honestly i'm pretty happy and seriously fuckin lost and baffled at the time being. 

 

so i've had my grad party... Some time ago, let's put it like that. Went to a restaurant with the whole class, restaurant/club which we shared with maybe other 3 or 4 schools

 

only went there to have some serious fun, drink a little, try not to declare myself to another friend (smh), definitely was not ready for this.

few drinks in after dinner (restaurant staff picked up the tables, it's now a large room with a dance floor and such) thought it'd be fun to take a look around, go on a search and rescue mission of sorts, if you know what i mean.

 

First girl I approached, got turnt off. No biggie, plus it was the first one, and I expected failure anywaya, so I just shook it off and kept going with my thing. 

 

After that I did some laps around the whole place, bumped into a girl that was staring at me, smiling etc. "fuck it", i said internally, what could go wrong, won't see most of these people after this anyways. so I approached, turns out she was really into me (finally something good happening, eh. i've had a shit year honestly). we went outside, danced for a few moments, stared into each other's eyes, made out for a bit (something close to 2h), then she just took the phone off my hands to give me her number.

All great, tbh, we then picked a spot an just sat down, spoke for a bit... 

 

Next day, she's the one opening up the convo (I though i'd give it a day or something, guess not), we just chatted for a few hours. She lives (kinda?) close (compared to other girls i've met), about one hour by car. Also says she want to take things slow. None are a problem actually, i'm getting my license soon, can ask for a ride to get dropped off there, didn't even get into this with high expectations. 

 

The thing is, now I'm like: And what the fuck now?

 

What does that "I wanna take it slow" mean?

 

Does she like me (or at least is attracted to-?)? She has told me that she thinks i'm really handsome, but tbh I'm the one who thinks she's out of my league (but it's one of those things you don't really say). She even asked me if I was talking to other girls atm. She's also really flirty when we talk. 

 

What now? 

 

Tbh I just hate how my friends take things actually. Been told she'll just go and, you know,  mate with the next dude she meets that lives close/has a car/is more attractive (i'm overly sensitive about this last one). Can't ask my friends about these things because they'd rather tease me than give a real answer, so I decided I'd ask anonymously on this forum. 

 

thanks in advance guys, really appreciate it. I think these are the things you'd expect your father to help with, but that's impossible for me given the situation. I also hope I managed to give this giant wall of text some sense and cohesion, sorry bout that. 

Edited May 18, 2019 by _chain

[gamergoggles 67]

I think it would be needless to try to elaborate on what it means as it varies to each person and could potentially cause you to overthink it. Depending how far along you two are, the best thing would be just to clarify with her and get a feel for what she's looking for. If you're still in the early stages and talking then I would say just go with the flow for now and eventually lead into having a conversation to clarify what you two are looking for when it feels right if she doesn't clarify with you beforehand.

 

Albeit, As much as it would be nice to just go with the flow, sometimes insecurities (like the one you mentioned) may arise when things are blurred. So I think it's maintaining a balance of going with the flow whilst taking your insecurities into consideration, you don't want to be getting to the point where you're hurting just because of what's blurred. 

 

If you do ask and get a vague or avoiding answer, your best bet is just keep your options open as she could be just stringing you along. 

[Diabeetus_X 10]

i didnt read but i think that right hand will work just fine.

[Dasimoge 69]

12 hours ago, _chain said:

out of my league

That shouldn't be a obstacle.

 

12 hours ago, _chain said:

is more attractive

Look attracts, Character holds. (The first point don't have to be always true, a real girl would definitly look on the second point )

If your friend is attractive, but got a bad character. You can be sure it won't work for him then.

 

[NotZombieBiscuit 2919]

Overthinking shit.

[_chain 175]

23 minutes ago, NotZombieBiscuit said:

Overthinking shit.

thank you, case closed. 

[Eisena 86]

 

My condolences.

[Too_many_snowflakes 80]

If you go looking for love, you're not going to find it.  

Focus on enjoying life, and being the best you you can be. 

Someone will notice eventually.